Parenting Beyond Your Capacity – Chapter 3

A few weeks ago I wrote a blog post about Chapter 3 and it didn’t save or upload.  At that point I was so frustrated I just had to walk away for a bit.  Now I’m back and excited to share with you a few tidbits that Carey and Reggie share.  This chapter begins the first of 5 main points to the book or FAMILY VALUES.  “Widen the Circle”

All of us have grown up in different environments, but we could all have benefited from our parents widening the circle of influence and inviting other adults to speak into our lives both practically and spiritually.  This chapter is all about parents realizing that kids don’t always want to hear their parents voices and take their advice.  They want (and will seek) advice from others.  As parents we can Continue reading


Kid CEO book

Have you read this book?  I haven’t, but may snatch it up while it’s 20% off right now.  Check out the description on their page.

If you’ve been around The Journey long enough you will hear the phrases:

God’s my #1, my spouse is my #2, etc.  even though our culture says that it should be much different.  It’s hard not to let the kids become #1.

I know some of you have already read this, but I’m looking forward to it.  =)  If you have read it, what did you take away from it?  What was 1 practical next step that you chose to take as a family?

Parenting Beyond Your Capacity: Chapter 2 part 2

I left you hanging a few weeks ago. Now I’m back to reviewing the book after I finally found it in the bottom of the diaper bag.  So, without further delay, part 2….(if you need a reminder of part 1, it’s right here.)

God’s Story.

Yep, we don’t have perfect families and God doesn’t expect us to have perfect families.  We can’t because we’re not perfect.  God wants to show up and change us and reveal Himself.  They talk about the idea of God’s story and how He is a God of “restoration and redemption.”  I love those 2 words!

There’s so much more, but I don’t want to give away the book.  I’ll leave you with a quote from the book.  “Don’t focus on the picture.  Focus instead on the bigger story God desires to illustrate through you.” (p.45)

Parenting Beyond Your Capacity – Chapter 2

Does anyone else read books with pens and highlighters?  I’m terrible about marking up books.  I don’t like reading other people’s books because mine end up marked up.  Here are some of my highlights from Chapter 2 – STOCK FAMILY SYNDROME:

Our stories and families are all different.  No two are the same.  We all know this, right!?  Then why do we all compare and try to look like the perfect family?  Go to iStock photo and search for  “family” images and see what comes up! Yeah, I know that I’ll look just like them in a few years.  I was joking at staff meeting on Monday that I must look a mess most days.  Let’s just look at my grocery trip: I rush into Meijer, Eliana’s climbing out of the cart restraint, I have swamp pit, my hair is standing on end, the elastic waistband pregnancy pants are falling to my knees, Eliana is eating my shopping list (hey, she’s being quiet), dirty looks from Grandmothers, and yes at the end of it all, there’s the penny horse to ride as the milk sours. Oh, and where did I park the car?  Do I feel like that perfect mother?  No way!  I only have 1 toddler, and 1 on the way.  I often feel like I’m failing as a wife and mother, but this chapter talks about just that.  (So, curious as I am, I searched “tired mom” on istock – check out what came up. Yeah, right!)

I feel like this is a good time to stop today.  So, we’re all messed up.  Let’s see what the 2nd half of the chapter says in the next post.

Parenting Beyond Your Capacity – Chapter 1

Here are a few highlights from Chapter 1:

  • Reggie shares how overwhelmed he felt when he was reading parenting books, researching how to be a better parent, etc.  “It seemed like there were dozens of things I needed to improve, and it was difficult to know where to start.” (p. 25)
  • They go on from there stating that the idea behind this book is not to be one more thing or high standard to try and meet, but to show you that partnering with the church and others with this tough job (of parenting and spiritually influencing your children) isn’t meant to be done alone.
  • A question I want to ask myself is if I’m parenting “random or reactive” (p. 25)
  • Am I making decisions based on what’s happening now, or on the big picture?
  • Parenting Priorities – he shares his (I don’t want to give it all away ~ although they’re obviously throughout all of the main points of this book.)
  • We have these ideal standards with parenting and they quickly make us feel guilty.
  • “You are not the only influence your kids need” – (p.28)  It sounds funny at first, but so true!  Kids and teens often seek others for advice.  Don’t you want to encourage them to pick those people wisely?  (Journey Teens small group leaders, coaches, etc.)
  • “Your role is not to impress your children or anyone else with your ability to parent; your role is to impress your children with the love and nature of God.” (p.29)

Parenting Beyond Your Capacity – Intro

I’m not big into book prefaces/introductions, but I think they did a great job in this book, so I’ll start here.  (Who has a foreward by Jeff Foxworthy anyway!?  Ya gotta read it.  =)  It’s so easy to run by things that we know well, and assume everyone else is speaking your language.  Not here.

Some highlights:

  • When Carrie and Reggie admit that they’re “somewhat dysfunctional”, “a little insecure”, and “more stressed than we should be”.  That coming from “experts” and pastors!  Wheh!  I feel better already.  This book isn’t going to give me an ideal picture to try and make my family fit into.
  • They introduce the idea of orange  – the combining of 2 influences – RED, the love of the family/parents and YELLOW, the light and influence of the church.  “These two combined influences will make a greater impact than either influence alone.” (p.19)  -Woohoo!  We’re not in this alone parents!
  • The ideas in this book are more like “a compass than a road map.  The last thing we want to do is create a new impossible standard, more parenting initiatives, and more tasks for you to do.” (p. 20)

Ask in your local bookstore (Hage’s if you’re in Muskegon) or order it online.  It’s a great, easy read.

Chapter 1 highlights to come….

Parenting Beyond Your Capacity

A few weeks ago I wrote about how excited I was to read this book.  Now I have it and wanted to let you know that I’ll be writing about what I read right here on my blog.  Come back and see what I have learned from Reggie and Carey.

I’ve also been posting links to their blog “Orange Parents” (the link is also to the right) on my Facebook feed.  They just started, but it’s great and easy to read.  It’s not one of those places you go and feel “Whoah, I am not doing that, or that, or that….I must be a horrible parent!”

So, off I go to reading and highlighting!